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August 01, 2003
Reflection on deleted entries
I just found a disc with my middle school and high school internet/weblog work. 1997-2001 ::insert nostalgic moment::
For those readers that have kept up with my antics over the course of time, you'll notice that my writing style has changed a little bit. At the very least, I tend to write short essays or stories now — probably a natural transition, given that you're writing for an audience and you want to challenge yourself, right? Right.
It's more than that too, I think. I've definitely changed as a person from 1997, for the better. Also, I'm growing up and maturing. How my writing reflects that, I can't put my finger on. ("Can't put my finger on?" Obviously, my grammar isn't one of the things that has improved.) And that's the reason why I've been so hesitant about putting all of archives online. I mean, the old funny posts are damn funny. Those aren't the posts I'm worried about.
The posts I'm worried about are the posts where I'm at my ultimate, heart-breaking lows. The ones where I'm nearly in tears, rambling into a web application at four in the morning because it's past my curfew and everyone else's. The ones where I'm crashing from the Ben & Jerry's ice cream I quickly demolished in one sitting. I read the posts again, and the memories come flooding back. And don't start with me about the posts about the father figure.
I've moved on from it, sure I have. But I don't like feeling vulnerable. It's a feeling I'm all too used to.
And there's my rambling and short attention span kicking up again, because the reason why I initially posted this wasn't for a self-proclaimed pity party, it's because of this: I'm not going to bring back those old posts. Thanks.
[Photo taken with LG VX6000 Camera Phone.]
Posted by Stacy on August 1, 2003 01:32 AM | Filed In: Blog
